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24 things you should never say to a bride-to-be

Written by Katie Byrne, published 24th jan 2017

Whether you're a member of the bridal party or simply a wedding guest - do NOT let these words pass your lips...



 

On hearing you're engaged...

"Oh, so you're you pregnant then?"

"Well, this is disappointing - I always thought I'd get married before you."

"Is that a temporary ring until he gets you a proper one? ... Oh."

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"It's so cute how minimalist you guys are. I'd go crazy if my ring didn't feature at least one diamond..."

"So - what's my bridesmaid gift?"

"I'm so thrilled you guys are still together. When I first met [insert partner's name], I thought he'd break up with you within the week."

"I was looking at that engagement ring pic you put on Facebook. I didn't realise your fingers were so chunky!"

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On your wedding plans...

"Getting married on a Saturday? Really? You're so mainstream it hurts."

"So how much are your mum and dad coughing up then?"

"Are you worried [partner] won't turn up on the big day? Haw haw haw."

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"See, my problem is I have too many friends. So our guest-list would have to be a lot bigger than yours."

"...All I'm saying is, personally, I wouldn't be able to spend that much money on flowers."

"When you throw your wedding bouquet, can you make sure you throw it at me? I.e. - to me?"

"People will hate you for not providing a free bar for the whole night. You know that, right?"

 

On the wedding dress...

"Wow - not many people could pull that off!"

"...Gosh."

"See, I'd just feel embarrassed showing off that much leg/decolletage/etc."

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"You planning to lose weight before the wedding day, then?"

"Ha ha ha. Very funny. Now show us the real dress!"

 

On the wedding day itself...

*Coughs loudly and hilariously when the officiant asks if anyone has objections to the marriage*

"Ha - I'd be so embarrassed if I cried on my wedding day."

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"What fabulously thoughtful favours. I've always wanted a tiny bag of sugared almonds. Despite my nut allergy."

"Was there rationing on when they chose this wedding breakfast or...?"

"It's so embarrassing how drunk the groom's mum is..."


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