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“Can I have a matron of honour AND a maid of honour?”

“Can I have a matron of honour AND a maid of honour?”

Written by Katie Byrne

Of course you can - and here's how to make it work!


The maid of honour - or matron of honour, if she’s already married herself - is an in-charge figure who will head up the other bridesmaids and be the bride’s number-one port of call during her wedding planning.

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Traditionally speaking, the MOH will act alone: a kind of management figure, overseeing the other members of the bridal party. However, what if you want both a maid of honour and a matron of honour?

First up: yes, you can totally do that! Duh. It’s your wedding - you can do what you want. As well as helping you get over trying to decide who you want to ask to be your MOH, having two can sometimes work more comfortably from a logistics angle, too. For example: if one of them is long-distance, you’ll have the other to fall back on from time to time. Or if one of them is snowed under with work, chances are the other one will be more available.

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Also, it works from another perspective. Having both a married and unmarried woman helping you get ready for your own voyage down the aisle will arm you with two differing perspectives - especially if they’re different ages, too.

But be prepared: there are a few factors you should consider before you invite your leading ladies to step up for their dual-role…

Know what you actually want or need them both to do. Create distinct roles for each of them, so there’s no room for stepping on toes or competitiveness - also, decide how their roles are different from those of your bridesmaids. (If you’re having ‘maids - see point #4, below.)

Consider whether or not they’ll get on with each other. We’ve all seen Bridesmaids - and sometimes, as hard as it is to accept, just because two people are your friends, doesn’t mean they’ll be each other’s friends. You don’t want the run-up to your wedding dominated by bickering or politics, and you certainly don’t want to feel like you have to pick a side.

So, if they have strong, clashing personalities or you simply have a feeling they’d clash - swerve it. A good way to test the water, if they’ve never met before, is to arrange a casual get-together and see how they bounce off each other - obviously don’t tell them you’re assessing their potential double-act capabilities...

Give their outfits some thought. Will they dress the same, or similarly? And if not, how will you identify them to your guests as your MOHs? Work it out with them: similar stand-out frocks are obviously the easy option but if they have very different senses of style, you could perhaps look at matching accessories instead, such as flower crowns or corsages.

Will you still have bridesmaids? If you’ve already got your duo of MOHs, do you want (or need) more people to join you? There are plenty of other ways your friends can be involved in your celebration if not - click here to start reading!


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